Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.

Here’s our list from today:

 

1 Osarumen Osamuyi

At the beginning of this month, freelance writer, copy writer and editor, David Adeleke tweeted a request for help using the popular gofund.me campaign. Somehow the tweet landed before his namesake, Davido, and the musician on his own accord, promised he will help.

See below:

https://twitter.com/DavidIAdeleke/status/861521583822839809

We get d same name .. I no get choice lol DM ME https://t.co/K3QmLOSf7I

— Davido (@iam_Davido) May 9, 2017

David’s request was to make $3,500 before the 15th of May. The date came and passed and Davido continued to observe graveyard silence. Until Osarumen Osamuyi called him out on it:

I'm actually very annoyed with this Davido fellow. People were fundraising on their own, on a tight deadline, and you came to promise /1

— Osarumen Osamuyi (@SkweiRd) May 26, 2017

 

MOST BENEVOLENT! Now, you've promised another kid money for his schooling (that he did not beg you for), so we can clap for you. Take ?? /7 pic.twitter.com/2UWW395Hip

— Osarumen Osamuyi (@SkweiRd) May 26, 2017

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUg_NPHl3Nk/?taken-by=davidoofficial

"tAtI BiLlIOn fOr tHe aKaNT e O" pic.twitter.com/igGKGXxdGg

— Osarumen Osamuyi (@SkweiRd) May 26, 2017

Nigerians react

2. Davido claps back- in an I’ve got-to-save-my-face-typa-way

Yea I sent a wire yday from my American account which will reach him on Monday it's an international transfer so you wouldn't understand.. https://t.co/OeyHzs3GAH

— Davido (@iam_Davido) May 26, 2017

Reactions:

@SkweiRd ?

— mogwai. (@TheVunderkind) May 26, 2017

Fuckboy, promise and fail merchant. Stop being fake son, get your shit together.

— Su (@dcodedboii) May 26, 2017

Sent wire transfer only yesterday? You made the promise almost 3 weeks ago. It's not good enough.

— SloaneRanger???? (@Ha99ibal) May 26, 2017

Why didn't you just use your local account?

— Contè (@Sirqef) May 26, 2017

This is like after the fact tho. Deadline's already passed, it's a good thing the guy made it without having to wait on you.

— Temi OFR (@haryourbharmee) May 26, 2017

"It's an international transfer so you wouldn't understand" pic.twitter.com/jdzZp2wttO

— Quincy Roberts (@quincysings) May 26, 2017

Davido screwed him. He made a public promise that affected his ability to raise money. Then reneged until his friends intervened.

— ST. (@seyitaylor) May 26, 2017

Waiting for Monday to reach, before I comment pic.twitter.com/qRQZ44O5s4

— Let's #BoycottCowMeat (@iamUncleMark) May 26, 2017

Don’t you love it when Nigerian go ‘Voltron, Defender of The Universe’ on your behalf?

 

3. Hillary Clinton

Former Presidential candidate, Hillary Clinton put Donald Trump on roast when she gave the commencement speech at her alma mater -Wellesley College- today.

She compared Trump to President Nixon of the Watergate scandal and made quips like “There is an assault on truth and reason”

See below:

Hillary Clinton's commencement address at Wellesley College had some of her best Trump burns yet pic.twitter.com/GzTfuSCYeS

— NowThis (@nowthisnews) May 26, 2017

 

Reactions

I am so proud of my mom & very grateful, every day, to be her daughter cc: @HillaryClinton https://t.co/VR85KcXB6E

— Chelsea Clinton (@ChelseaClinton) May 26, 2017

What a great speech. @HillaryClinton will never stop believing in—and fighting for—truth and reason. https://t.co/nSTxVsnYKt

— Bill Clinton (@BillClinton) May 26, 2017

https://twitter.com/RealJeremyNolt/status/868146944660697091

Hillary Clinton's #Wellesley2017 commencement speech shows us how a true leader leads. RETWEET if you stand with Hillary! #ImStillWithHer pic.twitter.com/Q0jJ8ImoG3

— Protect Robert Mueller ✊ (@DisavowTrump20) May 26, 2017

https://twitter.com/Millennial_Dems/status/868141471253352453

4. Osinbajo

With every move Acting President Osinbajo makes, he proves further that he is the people’s man. He’s got charm, charisma and no airs. Osinbajo made an unscheduled stop at Garki market in Abuja today, and the ‘hailing’ he received was over the top.

See below:

At the unscheduled stop at the Garki market today, the energy and the joy was unparalleled.
Thank you! pic.twitter.com/j1gMueCqI6

— Prof Yemi Osinbajo (@ProfOsinbajo) May 26, 2017

I just stopped by at theGarki market, Abuja.
This lady and I discussed some of the issues she faces in the sale of fish at the local market pic.twitter.com/5KV8Ninmo8

— Prof Yemi Osinbajo (@ProfOsinbajo) May 26, 2017

Reactions:

Osinbajo is pulling BASIC leadership stunts and everyone is applauding. Shows how LOW and DISASTROUS of a leader Buhari is.

— Tomide (@MrTomide) May 26, 2017

"Osinbajo did right over this Biafra issue".
So you knew Buhari was mishandling it and you kept hailing him?

You wanted Buhari to fail.

— Demola Olarewaju (@DemolaRewaju) May 26, 2017

Amazing how APC morons that justified Buhari's brutal clampdown on IPOB/Biafra agitators are now celebrating Osinbajo's reaching out.

— Mr Stanley Nwabia (@MrStanleyNwabia) May 26, 2017

5. @DonThe Merchant

There’s still some talk going on about Biafra at 50.

So as it is #Biafra50 or #biafraAt50

The only thing that resonates again and again and again is Akpabio's speech, years back.

????????? pic.twitter.com/KrO5xOzubM

— Statesman of Hope (@DonTheMerchant) May 26, 2017

6. Jared Kushner

Ivanka Trump’s husband seems to be in the eye of the storm as the FBI has honed in on him to produce significant information. It is still unclear what activities have attracted the FBI to Kushner’s doorsteps, but that hasn’t stopped Americans from drawing connections or the Simpsons from throwing shade.

EXCLUSIVE: Jared Kushner now under FBI scrutiny in Russia investigation, officials tell NBC News https://t.co/li3z8Vyj78 pic.twitter.com/yF6i2BUVqW

— NBC News (@NBCNews) May 25, 2017

Gangsters don't hire family members because they're qualified. Gangsters hire family members because they're less likely to talk to the FBI. https://t.co/JLD78e40D7

— Jason Kander (@JasonKander) May 25, 2017

7. The Simpsons

Watch:

The Simpsons takes on Trump-Comey (complete with Nixon cameo) and it’s the *perfect* way to start your weekend. pic.twitter.com/uA0VdhkMXd

— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) May 26, 2017

 

Bonus:

https://twitter.com/elnathan_john/status/868015868986499072

Gov Ambode sacks chaplain of Alausa Chapel because Ambode's wife was in the church's anointing service and didn't receive ANOINTING OIL 1ST.

— Nedu Ekeke #BBOG (@Nedunaija) May 26, 2017

https://twitter.com/elnathan_john/status/868015868986499072