Every day on the Nigerian Internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social issues, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here are the ones we saw today:
As Dan Millman said, the secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new. We must build the new Nigeria and the old Nigeria of tribalism and religious strife will give away to a new Nigeria where we are all our brothers keepers.
— Ben Murray-Bruce (@benmurraybruce) March 1, 2019
FACTS!
It should be obvious to all that people in each ethnic group voted for both Buhari & Atiku. Some have started a sick narrative that they will no longer give alms to those they perceive to be “northern” because they “voted Buhari.” Not everyone that carries a smartphone is well.
— Dr. Joe Abah (@DrJoeAbah) March 1, 2019
Someone just sent me 1,500naira,who wants to shut down Quilox with me????
— Gbemi Lagos (@prinzgbemi) March 1, 2019
You are not well.
Literally nobody:
African: “HOMOSEXUALITY IS NOT PART OF AFRICAN CULTURE HGFSHFKLD!”
20 Mins later:
White man: “you know, my trip to Africa was lovely. I—”
Same African: “WHICH PART OF AFRICA YOU VISIT? AFRICA IS DIVERSE WITH DIFFERENT PEOPLE AND DIFFERENT CULTURES HGDHKSH!” pic.twitter.com/yyy0GCRis7
— Godswill Vesta utong (@G_VestaUtong) March 1, 2019
Tweet of the day! Hands down.
Was having a conversation with a colleague of mine about finances, and how him and his wife approach it without conflict and he said something that gave me pause:
“Get someone has the same approach to money as you do. This is extremely important.”
Hmm…
— Max ‘Odogwu’ M. (@MakiSpoke) March 1, 2019
Some Nigerians could complain about their employers and your favourite contrarian Twitter accounts will still come out to tell them they’re self absorbed idiots who should be grateful for a job.
It’s in the blood.
— Bruce Bateman Esq (@your_stepdad) March 1, 2019
It’s in our DNA, bro.
The same mentality that demands people to be “grateful” to their parents for birthing and providing for them is the mentality behind erecting billboards to thank governors for paying salaries and building roads.
— Nerve Bender (@okemzuruoke) March 1, 2019
The same Nigerian brands that spend millions to advertise on Linda Ikeji and Instablog, though they publicly ‘despise’ them are the people that you think want to endorse the alte movement.
I sha don’t want to hear anyone crying that they exploited y’all two years from now
— Big lesbian (@Edgothboy) March 1, 2019
When Bernard Dayo isn’t writing about pop culture, he’s watching horror movies and reading comics and trying to pretend his addiction to Netflix isn’t a serious condition.
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