by Awosika Ibukunoluwa

                            “Now I have a guardian angel in Heaven who’s looking down on me.”

“Mrs. Show has gone to be with the Lord. It happened on Tuesday…” My aunt said. I let out out a loud laugh, in my mind; Such a huge joke. I’m certain she’d stop in a minute and tell me she was only kidding, I said to myself.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t a joke, my Grandma was really gone.

Slowly, tears filled my eyes. It was too hard to believe. I always wondered what would happen if I lost someone close and I guess I finally got a chance to know.

The hardest thing though was that I had prayed so hard for her recovery. This wasn’t the good news I had expected to hear! No! I was disappointed.

On second thoughts, when you pray for someone who is ill to recover but instead, they go to be with the Lord; They are better you know. They are free from pain, stress and all the negative conditions associated with illnesses. So, maybe my prayers did get answered.
When I lay in bed that night, I cried; It was the first of many of those kind of nights. The next morning, I woke up in tears. I and Grandma were birthday mates and our birthday would soon be here; Gosh! Who would I celebrate with? Who would tell me to pray for my husband? Who would get up at night to pray for my siblings and I? Who else would love me like I was hers from the very beginning?

The burial was hard but the hardest part was watching the coffin go down into the grave. I stood there and wept like a baby because it all became real to me; I had lost my ‘Grandma Ondo’, the woman who took care of me and loved me like no other.

Now, I still miss her so much. I hold back those tears from rolling down my cheek, every now and then. Sometimes, I wish the world would end so we’d be together again. Every time I hear “His eyes are on the sparrow” I remember her because it was she who taught me that hymn. I never really knew what it was to lose a close friend but now I do.

The only great thing is that I had Him by my side all the time; He’s here with me now. The assurance that everything will be fine is all nestled in the love He has for me. So I know that when life seems scary and empty at times, I have my love Jesus who’ll never leave my side. He’s the reason I believe that she’s fine and is watching down on me. Now I have a guardian angel in Heaven who’s looking down on me.

Dear Grandma, I miss you so much and can’t wait to meet again. I’ll make you proud though because I know you’re watching. I love you grandma(insert smile).

To all who have lost someone and are in despair, take heart in the Saviour , He cares more than you’ll ever know!

He’s all you need too.
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Awosika Ibukunoluwa is a writer who pen artistry inspires and serves as a light to others. She hopes to be an answer to the prayers of others. She tweets from @Aunty_HotStuff.

30 Days, 30 Voices series is an opportunity for young Nigerians from across the world to share their stories and experiences – creating a meeting point where our common humanity is explored.

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija